OK, BIG NEWS
My Memoir: Choices, Changes & Friends – 1970s After Divorce – has been sent to the publisher! If you are interested in an Early, autographed copy at a reduced price, to do a review or comment, don’t hesitate to contact me directly – firstname.lastname@example.org It is 570 pages and the discount, autographed copy is $25.00
In the radical 1970s, four-long-time, female friends – Beth, Connie, Michael and April – newly divorced with children – have no idea how their lives can change so quickly. These somewhat ordinary, Chicago suburbanite-housewives became willing participants in escapade sex, some drugs and more alcohol than needed. Their backgrounds give an idea of their need for independence. The U.S. was in quite an upheaval with protest marches of all types, but they were rarely vocal concerning the Viet Nam war, or the inequality of the sexes. They liked men, just not the ones they’d been married to, and though not fairy tale-dreamers, a little romance would be nice.
These ladies endured a much lesser-known problem: truly a case of suburban-blight from television-burnout and sexually-inept/non-attentive, emotionally-abusive husbands. So, the cure was thought to be a job – get out of the house to regain some knowledge of self – whoever that was. Being up to your ankles in Cheerios, with only conversations of three-syllable sentences did become monotonous and demeaning. But a job was not the solution, it was the beginning of real awareness that PTA meetings, and exciting trips to the emergency room for your children were no longer emotionally fulfilling enough, or satisfaction for a twenty-five-year old.
Told boredom was part of marriage, and to make the best of it, but when that was no longer working, the domino-affect began. Once Connie took the ‘giant-leap of divorce for womankind,’ Beth, then April soon followed. Michael’s was the ugliest, since President of the PTA, but pregnant by her lover. They knew divorce was not easy, or any guarantee of happiness, but also learned ‘winners risk,’ as they took the gamble. None of them ever had any real control over their lives before, but they certainly wanted to try. Then, if they failed or succeeded, those were their choices and changes, as they learned divorce was not the full answer. They tried to formulate the questions about what they did want from life, for themselves and to have a good relationship. Whatever that was.
The ladies experimented dating men, not acceptable before: tried some drugs, often drank too much, but also danced their cares away. With new male-attention, they grew more brazen and confident exploring the gamut of willing men for dalliance, clandestine, some bikers, then even a ménage à trois with a famous movie star for Connie and Beth. This empowered them more than they expected – laughing and learning. They also took college classes, started a house-cleaning service, then thought about their changes, as the friendships shifted. Dilemma and decisions of children-choices, a real career and the ‘biggie’ of remarriage came up, as years rolled by. A sense of humor, wiry satire in situations, and sarcasm handled whatever hit each one.
Life separated them, when Beth and April move out of State, and then Beth overseas – still they reunited frequently. They’re definitely changed-women twenty-plus years later, who have grown so much, in so many different ways. And yet, some things do not change – like how they support each other through difficulties that would tear weaker-women apart. At times, their history together alone was the foundation that kept them moving forward through life’s harshest realities – Connie’s son’s death, Michael’s cancer, April becoming a hoarder and Beth a corporate-workaholic. Still friends, they did change their lives, and encouraged many more women around them to do the same, sharing their experiences of the wild and crazy-times of their younger years that did help them learn from life.
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